she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
