Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
