who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
