in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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