You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
