you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
