yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
