brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize