I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
