David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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