Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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