Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize