Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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