hell yes lets make some ravioli
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
