just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
