Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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