the new term for farting is butt boxing.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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