He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Randomize
