At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
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