he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
there was a trapeze. enough said
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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