I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
