Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize