Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I think I am morally bankrupt
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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