Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize