Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
