vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
