Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
