I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
