oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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