dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
