Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
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