I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
we're making bets on your personal life
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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