Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Randomize
