It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
