she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
