ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
