I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
