And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
i dont even know how to be here
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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