I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
this will be a night to untag.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
