Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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