I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
