I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
