I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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