If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
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