Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
