Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
