dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Sorry about my life...
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
