I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
