Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
