the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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