I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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