I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
